Ceremony 101: Getting Started

4 Things When Planning Your Wedding Ceremony

Planning for your ceremony is a big deal - it is after all the whole reason for planning a wedding right? Most couples tell us that like most of the planning, they aren’t even sure where to even get started and just sort of “end up” planning the ceremony. So we decided to pull together 4 tips to get started on planning what is sure to be the BEST thing about your day - your ceremony! 

One thing we cannot stress enough when it comes to your ceremony is to choose your officiant wisely. We dive into this a little more in our blog that talks about whether or not to have a family or friend officiate but at the end of the day you want to make sure you talk through your ceremony in-depth with your officiant. It will get you all on the same page, make sure you are both prepared and ready for a smooth ceremony. Okay so on to the tips! 

1 - Know your peeps! ​

You need to decide who will be a part of your ceremony. This can range a bit but in general, you will want to think about the following key players:

Officiant (of course) - make sure they are legally ordained in your area so that it counts!
Wedding Party - who will be standing by you? Whether it’s just 1 person for each of you or 8 on each side choose wisely. Those photos are going to be hanging on the living room wall for the rest of your lives! All kidding aside, your wedding parties do not have to be even in number so don’t stress that too much. Of course, you’ll also want to know who your maid of honor / best man is as well [or man of honor / best maid].
Family - parents, grandparents, siblings, and aunts/uncles. They will all want to know if they have a role, what it will be, what to wear, and where to be. Traditionally parents are a part of the procession. Grandparents really depend on how comfortable they are walking, and your overall vision. Commonly we have siblings or an aunt or uncle that take the place in these roles as well - so if your family structure is unique let it shine! You should be surrounded by your family, no matter what their label is. 
Flower girl and ring bearers - when choosing these roles most couples are still sticking to the traditional route and choosing young ones. You will want to think through their ages - under 3 will need to be accompanied down the aisle. If there are no children in your life then don’t sweat it! Half of our weddings do not have either of these and the others sometimes just have one or the other. Again - it is your day so do it your way! 
A new trend we’re seeing includes adults in these roles and simply giving their title a small change. Put your brother on petal patrol complete with a server's half apron that has pockets full of petals - or ask your grandparents to carry a single stem flower and your rings down the aisle instead. ​

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Ushers and greeters - this is an area we’ve seen change over the past couple of years as well. Ushers are not a typical role now that “choose a seat not a side” has become so popular. However, you should think back to those grandparents and parents you decided to include in your ceremony. Traditionally, the women will need an escort down the aisle and their significant other will follow behind. Especially if their significant other is walking, say, the bride down the aisle. 
Greeters, or the welcome party as we call them are a great way to welcome your guests. Have them staged at the entrance to your ceremony area, perhaps by your guest book handing out programs or waters to your guests as they arrive.

2. Add your own touch!

So what exactly goes into a ceremony? Well, so glad you asked. A ceremony [legally] is made up of very specific sections. Your officiant will know all the details but what you will need to focus on is adding your own spin on things to make it mirror your personality as a couple. That includes:

• Choosing your script [for the officiant]: some like a little back story, or jokes given while others prefer very professional. Make sure you discuss this with your officiant!
• Unity ceremony: do you two want to include a sand or candle ceremony? What about the rope braiding or wine bottle? So many more options to choose from if you’re leaning that way. Keep in mind your venue’s policies and also where your ceremony is. Outdoors can be tricky for candles so we don’t suggest them for our couples.
• Songs and readings: will you have someone sing or play a song during your ceremony? What about a reading or scripture to read? 
• Traditions: easily our favorite! Your family may have traditions based on your culture, heritage or religion that you want to incorporate. These are things you want to keep in mind when choosing an officiant and while planning. Be sure to fill your wedding party in on the specifics as well - not everyone knows what jumping the broom is!

3. Nail down the when

If you haven’t already, you really should think through when you want to have your ceremony. In the US most couples have the ceremony the same day as their reception and immediately go from saying I Do to the celebration.

Some cultures extend this by having the ceremony (or one of them) on a separate day. You also want to decide what time of day fits your vision the best. 

• Morning: This makes a perfect brunch style reception! We love seeing the mimosa bars, and guests almost always stay until the grand exit since they aren’t worried about getting home late or the next morning.
• Midday: These are very popular on Sundays and for cocktail style receptions. A great way if you’re trying to celebrate and save money as guests do not expect to be fed a full meal. 
• Evening: The most traditional time, the ceremony is typically followed by a full dinner and dessert as well as an evening filled with dancing! Be careful to check the sunset time and daylight savings before setting your time.

4. Figure out placement

So you figured out the who, now it’s time to decide where. Typically the couple is front and center (of course) so all your guests can see you. The officiant will stand behind you so they won’t be blocking anyone’s view, and your wedding parties streaming off to the sides. ​

• ​Maid of Honor / Best Man will be the closest to you with the rest of the wedding party lined up past them.
• The flower girl/ring bearer really depends on their ages. If they are older they can stand with the wedding party - usually between the maid of honor / best man and the next member of the party but slightly closer to the guests (not in line with the wedding party). If they are younger it is definitely a safer route to have them sit with their parents after making it down the aisle. 
• Parents and grandparents are typically in the first rows.
• DJ - don’t forget the pro that will be taking care of your sound! They are typically found (only if you look hard for them) in the back corner of the ceremony area behind the seated guests. This allows them to play the music that you can hear before walking down the aisle as well as run any microphones you may be utilizing before sneaking off to the reception area after your ceremony ends.

This is just the beginning of planning your ceremony but remember - it may not take up much time the day of (at least compared to your reception) but it is the most important part of your day and deserves all the attention it demands during planning! A few other things to think about include:

• Songs: how many will you use and who will walk in to which one

• Programs and stationery for your guests
• Videography - will you hire someone? Will they need to mic the officiant too?
• Decor… oh that’s a big one! Check out our “part 2” for ceremony tips where we focus on decor specifically!

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See a photo you love? All photos in this post are by Blackall Photography - go see her work!
www.blackallphotography.com

Ready for more ceremony detail fun? Check out this post about Ceremony Decor!

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